JANUARY 31, 2018

 The full acting out of the self's surrender to God therefore demands pain: this action, to be perfect, must be done from the pure will to obey in the absence, or in the teeth, of inclination. How impossible it is to enact the surrender of the self by doing what we like...” 
― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

EXODUS 25-26

1The Lord said to Moses, 2“Tell the Israelites to bring me an offering. You are to receive the offering for me from everyone whose heart prompts them to give.(25:1-2)

MATTHEW 21:1-22

12Jesus entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. 13“It is written,”he said to them, “ ‘My house will be called a house of prayer,’^e but you are making it ‘a den of robbers.’^f ”

14The blind and the lame came to him at the temple, and he healed them. 15But when the chief priests and the teachers of the law saw the wonderful things he did and the children shouting in the temple courts, “Hosanna to the Son of David,” they were indignant.

16“Do you hear what these children are saying?” they asked him.

“Yes,” replied Jesus, “have you never read,

“ ‘From the lips of children and infants

you, Lord, have called forth your praise’^g ?”

17And he left them and went out of the city to Bethany, where he spent the night.

JOURNAL 

So Jesus goes in and turns the Temple upside down, heals the lame and the blind and children begin to sing his praises.  I can only imagine the scene...it turns from a place of profiting off of peoples guilt and struggle to a place of healing and rejoicing. This is God's vision of the church...this is what we should aspire to create.

Yet so often in my experience the physical church is a place that leans more to the buying and selling than to a place for the lame and the blind. I realize that I am guilty of creating and contributing to this spectacle.  I do it when I get comfortable in my own success. For when I am feeling good about my own accomplishments I don't go out of my way to make time for those that might sour my day...or have me contemplate the ultimate triviality of my "comfortable" position. 

But then there are the times when failure strikes and I want someone to understand, someone to help pick me up...instead I find a bunch of people that are comfortable in their success. Just like me when I was in their position. I think that's why it angers me...I realize that I am no different than those I resent. 

So what am I to do?  My only hope is in surrendering my comfort, my resentment, my bitterness and instead...Seek God, obey him, love others as myself, forgive, have compassion, understanding, confront evil, but only after confronting it in my own mind and heart. Change is painful but the reality is that we are constantly changing one way or the other. Nothing ever stays the same and trying to secure a slice of human comfort is a futile toxic endeavor.

23Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

COLOSSIANS 3:23-24

JANUARY 30, 2018

“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.” 
― Henry David Thoreau

EXODUS 22-24

21“Do not mistreat or oppress a foreigner, for you were foreigners in Egypt.

22“Do not take advantage of the widow or the fatherless. 23If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry.(22:21-22)

MATTHEW 20:17-34

24When the ten heard about this, they were indignant with the two brothers. 25Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. 26Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant,27and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— 28just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

JOURNAL 

Recently with all the sickness and flu and some of the tragic deaths that have resulted...it just makes you aware of the brevity of life. I struggle with this, I want to know that I have plenty of time. I want to know that I'll have plenty of chances to achieve my goals and dreams. 

While I may...there is a chance that I won't. I don't like to think of that...it's depressing. But that is reality. So how am I to live with uncertainty of tomorrow? I think it's a whole lot simpler than I often make it. 

A couple of years ago I wrote down the things I have learned in this life, I think it's worth revisiting...

I've learned that there are no guarantees

That you can't bank on time

I've learned that you can never really walk in someone else's shoes 

so therefore you should never judge them

I've learned that experiences shape our thoughts and our actions

what you do and how you respond has a lot to do with what you learned through experience

I've learned that shame is toxic

It is the biggest threat to suck out all the energy and passion of our lives

I've learned that human beings are miraculous amazing creatures

we are equipped for both profound exquisite good as well as horrible evil

I've learned that most often we underestimate our ability 

therefore we sell ourselves and the good we actually can do way short

I've learned that sunrises and sunsets are amazing

pausing to watch and reflect breathes life into my heart

I've learned that rain is necessary 

and that tears are just as important

I've learned that music is a beautiful crazy gift

to embrace it connects us to others in ways that cannot be explained

I've learned that I would rather play and lose 

than watch and win

I've learned that connecting to another human being is vital

it produces a joy that can never be found alone

I've learned that all most people ever want is to connect and be understood

when it happens heaven is glimpsed...when it doesn't hell is unleashed

I've learned that children can teach us more than any book

yet we often are too distracted to notice

I've learned that the intricacies and details of this world are beyond words

the profound creativity convinces my heart of a creator

I've learned that truth and love conquer all

maybe not in the moment but definitely in the end

I've learned that every moment we are alive is a gift

to understand this produces passion, peace and joy and to 

fully embrace it means we live each moment in daring bold ways

I've learned that there is no better time than right here, right now, to create, to love, to mend,

to cry, to laugh, to hold, to fight, to win, to lose, to dance, to sing and to be overcome by the beauty and epic wonder of this life.

13You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh^a ; rather, serve one another humbly in love. 14For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”^b 

GALATIANS 5:13-15

JANUARY 29, 2018

“Self-sufficiency is the enemy of salvation. If you are self-sufficient, you have no need of God. If you have no need of God, you do not seek Him. If you do not seek Him, you will not find Him.” 
― William Nicholson, Shadowlands

EXODUS 19-21

2“I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.

3“You shall have no other gods before^a me.

4“You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, 6but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.(20:2-6)

MATTHEW 20:1-16

13“But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? 14Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. 15Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

16“So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

JOURNAL 

Commandments 1 and 2 set the foundation of the Bible. It is in these verses that all things take shape. God is to be our God and anytime something else takes his place we are ultimately broken and our sin is revealed.  The parable that Jesus tells here in Matthew affirms this point further, if God is truly our God, we would be grateful for whatever he gives us regardless of what someone else receives.

1Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ is born of God, and everyone who loves the father loves his child as well. 2This is how we know that we love the children of God: by loving God and carrying out his commands. 3In fact, this is love for God: to keep his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, 4for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. 5Who is it that overcomes the world? Only the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God.

1 JOHN 5:1-5

JANUARY 28, 2018

“In the same way a Christian is not a man who never goes wrong, but a man is enabled to repent and pick himself up and begin over again after each stumble--because the Christ-life is inside him, repairing him all the time, enabling him to repeat (in some degree) the kind of voluntary death which Christ Himself carried out." - Mere Christianity” 

― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

EXODUS 16-18

13The next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people, and they stood around him from morning till evening. 14When his father-in-law saw all that Moses was doing for the people, he said, “What is this you are doing for the people? Why do you alone sit as judge, while all these people stand around you from morning till evening?”

15Moses answered him, “Because the people come to me to seek God’s will. 16Whenever they have a dispute, it is brought to me, and I decide between the parties and inform them of God’s decrees and instructions.”

17Moses’ father-in-law replied, “What you are doing is not good. 18You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. 19Listen now to me and I will give you some advice, and may God be with you.(18:13-19)

MATTHEW 19:16-30

16Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”

17“Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied. “There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.”

18“Which ones?” he inquired.

Jesus replied, “ ‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony,19honor your father and mother,’^c and ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’^d ”

20“All these I have kept,” the young man said. “What do I still lack?”

21Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

22When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

25When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, “Who then can be saved?”

26Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

27Peter answered him, “We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?”

28Jesus said to them, “Truly I tell you, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. 29And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife^e or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.30But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first.

JOURNAL 

I love this interaction Moses has with his Father-in-law. It shows how God uses others in our lives. It also shows the importance of humility and being willing to give up control. This I think is behind Jesus' command to the young man. His wealth is a hindrance to him fully trusting God. Wealth has taken the place of God. 

Yesterday at the wrestling meet I came across great wisdom...it was in the hallway hung from the ceiling.  It said “True mental toughness. Having a great attitude, doing your very best, treating people very very well, having unconditional gratitude, no matter your circumstances.”  Wow...what a set of words to live by and I think that is Jesus and the gospel laid right out in those simple words. 

Thank you Father for another day, another chance to learn, to give my very best, to treat others very very well, and to show gratitude in every circumstance. 

37On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. 38Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.”^c

JOHN 7:37-38

JANUARY 27, 2018

“My idea of God is not a divine idea. It has to be shattered time after time. He shatters it Himself.” 

― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

EXODUS 13-15

13Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. 14The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”(14:13-14)

MATTHEW 19:1-15

13Then people brought little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked them.

14Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”15When he had placed his hands on them, he went on from there.

JOURNAL 

It is hard to be still and trust God. It is hard to not panic when things are falling apart. I can't blame the Israelites for the panic that ensued when Pharaoh began to pursue them. Over and over again though the command of God is to have the faith and trust of a child. 

I think one of the hardest things in life is watching your child struggle. It’s agonizing and too often stepping in and helping is the absolute wrong thing to do. More often as they get older they need understanding and someone to walk the tough road with them…rather than finding the quickest solution. 

Suffering and struggle does so many good things, it develops endurance, toughness, perseverance and ultimately confidence.

Over this past year I have seen one of my boys struggle…I’ve seen his confidence waver, I’ve seen him close to despair, I’ve heard the crack in his voice as he discusses bad days. Yet as we approach the one year mark since those struggles surfaced, I have seen something remarkable…I’ve seen a resolve in him that is palpable, a resolution to see it through, a refocus on what really matters, a courage to face his demons and a passion to beat them. 

What I’ve learned is the same thing I have learned in my own life. Struggles and adversity are not to be avoided or feared…but rather embraced. In my recent devotions walking through the life of Joseph and Moses…God’s provision of struggle was their greatest gift. It molded them into great leaders…for what would Joseph have been without the humility of prison, or Moses without the humility and knowledge of the desert. 

Father I am so grateful for today and all your provisions. I am grateful for the journey and all those that have been there to encourage us along the way. Your infinite wisdom shatters my finite understanding. 

6But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

JAMES 1:6-8

JANUARY 26, 2018

“[To have Faith in Christ] means, of course, trying to do all that He says. There would be no sense in saying you trusted a person if you would not take his advice. Thus if you have really handed yourself over to Him, it must follow that you are trying to obey Him. But trying in a new way, a less worried way. Not doing these things in order to be saved, but because He has begun to save you already. Not hoping to get to Heaven as a reward for your actions, but inevitably wanting to act in a certain way because a first faint gleam of Heaven is already inside you.” 
― C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

EXODUS 11-12

12“On that same night I will pass through Egypt and strike down every firstborn of both people and animals, and I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. I am the Lord. 13The blood will be a sign for you on the houses where you are, and when I see the blood, I will pass over you. No destructive plague will touch you when I strike Egypt.(12:12-13)

MATTHEW 18:21-35

32“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

35“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

JOURNAL 

These verses are very hard to deal with...the difference between the old and the new testament astounds me at times. It is so hard for me to accept that God would intentionally kill young children because of the rebellion of one man. I have always just dismissed these verses but honestly they really do bother me. Especially when juxtaposed with Jesus words about not harming children. 

Then we have Jesus words on how we should cancel the debt of those who owe us money just as God has canceled our debt to him. This is easier to accept, however what is hard is the mental debt that I sometimes hold...especially when I feel that someone doesn't recognize my kindness or my efforts. I feel that they owe me and that is just as much a debt as someone owing me money. 

I believe that all of this ultimately goes back to trusting the heart of God in any and all situations. Bad things happen and God allows them. God still asks us to trust him in spite of all the sin and evil in the world. He asks us to trust him even when we are not guaranteed an easy or "positive" outcome. But that is why I trust God all the more...the Bible hides nothing, it doesn't make excuses for some of the hard realities. It doesn't make empty promises. It gives us the cold, hard truth and asks us to follow, trust, love and sacrifice. This is tough but there is a goodness in it that is hard to describe or define. It is what gives me the courage to follow and believe regardless of the messiness. 

33“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

JOHN 16:33